Feeling 2022

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I don’t know about you, but I’m still feeling 22!

Gosh, what a year it has been for me. I started last year still waiting for my house in Castleford, West Yorkshire to sell. Trying to find something in Scotland without success, until my house finally sold in April, after a full year of actively being sold.

Everything went into storage and I travelled to my chosen base of Gourock with the plan to spend a month in an Airbnb while I continued the search. Choices are a bit limited with a budget and a dog in tow. I found that it was hard to find somewhere that would host us for a month or more. I guess in case the dog turns out to be a nightmare. Many that were dog-friendly would not have us for a month. And though the Gourock place looked fine on the photos, after I had lugged all my worldly possessions up the stairs, I realised if I was afraid to use something as basic as the kettle, due to what was breeding on it, I wasn’t going to last 24hrs in that situation.

As much as I can cope with a lot, the cleanliness was just something Brodie and I had an issue with. Lhasa Apsos have standards too! I was afraid of how dirty he was going to get in the house!

But it was a great demo of just how far I have come. Negotiating face to face, holding my ground with the host. Explaining my position. Exiting the situation with grace, while clearly stating my case. And getting all of my money back. In years gone past, I probably would have stayed and made myself miserable. If I had even made it to Scotland in the first place!

Change of Plan!

So then I lurched from one B&B to the next for a while, dog in tow, going where the houses came up. Again, the choices were unique that would take Mr B, and some places we left cleaner than when we arrived to them! Luckily just as the suitable properties seemed to be drying up for a while, I was kindly offered an out, staying with my friends back down south, while I continued to search remotely.

This became a 4 month stint back in the land of pedigree dogs. Which was a great way to spend the summer, bathing and grooming and being tempted to have another dog. Here, I finally managed to secure my new home in Halkirk, having decided I would have less competition further north.

Then there was another month in Leeds, living with my very good friend Pauline, before it was finally time to make the journey north.

My car actually broke down on the very day I was due to begin my travels and my eldest brother and his partner were very good about the fact they ended up doing nearly all the work, since I couldn’t get to the storage unit on time. When the AA did get my battery replaced, I broke the 8hr plus journey at Carluke and Helmsdale. Spending those 2 nights trying to guess what awaited me.

My moving plan, which couldn’t be altered, meant I arrived here on the day of the Queen’s funeral, but I was, regardless, made very welcome by the neighbours on both sides.

Not quite what I expected.

I had surprised myself with just how emotional I felt about the Queen’s death. I think for me, like a lot of people, it reminded me of my own not fully resolved grief about my mum’s death. And the Queen had been such a part of our lives and seemed like she would be there forever.

I arrived, feeling emotional enough, to find the house basically a quagmire of filth and refuse left by the last owner. Broken shower, toilet, washing machine, not all the radiators working. Don’t get me started on the carpets! Fur inches thick on the skirting and ground in grime everywhere.

And for the first few weeks, I was wrangling how to reclaim the items they took from the property that were legally required to be left; shelves, curtain poles. My conveyancer was not interested and screamed down the phone at me on one occasion, refusing to listen to the very valid point I was attempting to make. Again, I held my ground, and I insisted on speaking my piece calmly with clarity.

The sellers sent a man to the house to clear the garden and failed to pay him! Leaving me with the bill under threat of him dumping it on the shared access to the properties. It was fun times, I can tell you. And I had to make the decision whether I pursued matters legally to gain compensation.

Changing the way I make decisions; using emotion and logic.

And that was a dilemma. As I am generally like a tiger if someone pulls a stunt of such blatant unfairness. But this time, I let the anger and outrage swell and dip, and gave it more thought. Because I chose to stand back and analyse what would this take out of me. What satisfaction would it bring me? Any? Would I get anywhere with it? I knew I was in the right. But what money did these people have? Were they in hardship? Yes, it was wrong what they did to me, very wrong. But would it actually be a wrongdoing on my part to pursue it? Or would it tarnish my peace of mind for months and simply cost me more money with little to no satisfaction?

So I made a different decision this time. And I let it go. It irked me a little, but I reminded myself that I had done that for myself. I had the power, not them. And they were just simply people who did not think like me, or have the same principles, and they probably never will. And I am glad I am me and not them.

And the money came back to me in a different way, because the Universe rewarded that decision. And the fact I made a growth mindset choice. They may have patted themselves on the back at having got away with it; they may not have. Either way, I will never have to deal with them again, which is a win! And I could get on with taking and pouring love into the house to make up for the 3 years it has been neglected.

I still have mucky carpets though at this point in time! Not for too much longer, hopefully.

The car broke down again, and I was without transport for 10 days or so, while the starter motor was replaced. Luckily, it was under warranty, but I did not like having my wings clipped!

And Halkirk is amazing. I was sort of getting desperate at the time I found it. I had been outbid on so many in Ayrshire, and decided to go back to my idea of being really far north. And it was the best idea.

Life in Caithness

I have to remind myself every day that I am not on holiday. There is so much to do and see, year round. I’ve already been to Reiss and Keiss, Sandside and Dunnet beaches. Brodie and I have a walk on Thurso beach before we hit the Tesco on the regular! I have made it to John O’Groats and craft fayres and movies. And snow! There has been so much of my beloved snow. I have nearly been blown off a cliff at Duncansby Stacks, and it has all been amazing, and what I hoped for. And I have new friends and so many new opportunities. It just feels a bit easier to shift my energies for the better up here.

The view from the river in Halkirk is just stunning and uplifting.

The goats at Puffin Croft, John O’Groats

More adventures!

I have had my friend fall on the ice after Christmas dinner in Bettyhill, and spent all night with her in the A&E department in Wick. Life has truly been an adventure! And a learning curve. There was the carol singing in the barn at Puffin Croft Petting Farm. Not sure what the goats made of all that. It seemed like we had a duty to take advantage of all these lovely events that were happening.

I’ve also had the flu and even that had something to teach me. That it is ok to do nothing and say I am not well right now, I am watching TV and that’s that.

So what is the take home from this?

What I am telling you is you can have the life you want, at any time, and it is never too late in the day to choose the way you react to stressful situations. You can be the better person and make choices that lead to better things for you. Confrontation is not always the answer, sometimes it is. Assess all options. And if you struggle with any of that, of being heard, of making decisions that work for you, RTT is definitely a great idea.

The things I have learned through having RTT myself now inform my whole life and make it different. It’s still work; we all, whoever we are, have a duty to work on our mental health. We all have a mental health condition. It’s called being human and not having a clue what to do about that. But RTT stays with you forever. It’s the gift that keeps on giving.

Christmas was amazing. My new friend Anne had just passed her driving test, with a little teensy hypnotherapy help from me and her own capabilities. And my decorator, the very patient Chris, took the two of us and both of our dogs to go get the car in Inverness; in his van, all of us sharing the front seat!

There have since been many adventures to get her confidence up. Though she failed to tell me she had a fear of wading through flowing water until the day after we nearly got swept away in a burn! I since have now a 2nd pair of wellies and a boot bag! Who is this woman? Soon I will have more than one hat, and I never wear hats!

Early Christmas Dinner

That ended with a broken leg!

We will be doing a session on Anne soon that will be geared towards always telling Anne-Marie the absolute truth! Up front!

So, while life is not quite perfect yet, and there is plenty still to be done in the house and in business. I am really looking forward to this year (now that I have mourned the loss of Christmas) and to meeting some of you who are reading this, and helping you to fulfil your dreams.

And to getting back to my writing and reconnecting with my beloved Brigley Prior characters. Here’s to 2023. You never know just what amazing things might have happened by the end of it!

There are all sorts of seasons coming up: fishing, puffin-spotting, whales, dolphins, seals, the campervan and motorhome invasion.

The Halkirk Highland Games is this July. Bring on the hunky men in kilts! I am always on the lookout for writing inspo!

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About Me

Hello, I’m Anne-Marie. I am a RTT Practitioner, Romance Author, Championship Dog Show Judge.

I have a lot going on! But my primary focus is helping people achieve their personal and professional goals, whatever they may be. If you’re struggling, I am the kind of person you want in your corner.

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